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by orphan_account



Series: Out of Control [2]
Category: Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers - Ambiguous Fandom
Genre: And a little bit darker, And darker, Gen, Gets darker, I hurt Tony, I use too many tags, I'm a horrible person, Sick Tony, Sickfic, Tony Feels, Tony Has Trust Issues, Tony Stark Has Issues, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Until Tony needs a torch, steve is a dick
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-09-03
Updated: 2014-02-26
Packaged: 2017-12-25 05:19:44
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 3,782
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/949076
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Steve was...worried about Tony. He knew the man was erratic and odd, showing his face only when he was hidden behind Iron Man's mask. But the messages left around implied that he was a little more than erratic and more bordering on psychopathic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

It was the day he moved to Stark Tower that he first received a message. Nothing odd about it, a simple 'Welcome'. From Stark, he presumed. He'd thought that the man considered himself above acknowledging that he had moved into his home, but it seemed not.

He was maybe a little disappointed that Stark didn't greet him in person, but he wasn't really expecting much. Iron Man himself had been a very silent person, almost invisible in their fights despite his controlling role. He hadn't spoken on the com once, not even when he took the missile into space. He spoke with actions rather than words.

Steve had read that Stark had once been at the pinnacle of popularity, always attending social events. But he locked himself up after he came back from Afghanistan from captivity. He'd left worrying statements around SHIELD files, and the only person allowed inside, Pepper Potts, said that he was drinking most of the time, he rarely slept, and he didn't eat anything solid. On the files on him, he was described as erratic.

Not recommended to be Iron Man, either. But he did his job fine and really, that was all he cared about. He needed a place to be close to the other Avengers, and to be completely honest, he was curious about Stark. Why would someone lock themselves away? And how did he survive on alcohol and liquid food alone? Well, he wasn't interested in the science to do with that. Just the effect it had on Stark's appearance and strength. After all, Stark was a member of his team. He couldn't be unhealthy, Iron Man was a vital member.

*A*

The second time Stark left a message, it was complete nonsense. Gibberish. He was probably drunk.

At least, Steve thought that. Stark sent another message a few seconds later. 'I'm completely sober.'

It was puzzling, and Stark didn't explain the earlier message, which was a mess of letters and numbers.

*A*

The fourth message was after Steve checked the com links and found that Stark had never been connected in the first place. He'd yelled at the man, who had simply stood there in the suit, his face blank as usual. He hadn't reacted at all.

This one read; 'You just don't understand this at all, or me. I'm not stupid or crazy. I won't deny the whole 'death wish' thing. I'm just a coward.'

Evidently, he was. He hadn't been able to say anything to Steve's face, apparently.

*A*

The fifth message was nothing much. Just a simple 'Feeling down. I hope we're not called in for a couple days.'

But it made Steve worried when they were called in the next day. But Iron Man was as amazing as usual, though he got a little beaten up, one blow piercing the suit and the wound was oozing blood in a steady stream.

"Iron Man, are you okay there?" He asked, stepping towards him.

"Fine." A mechanical voice replied shortly. "That hardly ever happens. But I'm fine."

Steve dwelled on the words for hours afterwards. It took him a while to realise that he had never heard the robotic voice of the suit before. It was flat and imperfect, clearly mechanical. It halted in awkward places. So Stark had probably said it and then the suit had filtered it, or maybe the AI in the walls that gave him the messages.

*A*

The sixth message made Steve stop and worry. 'You realise that Jarvis could kill you any time I want, right?'

Steve moved out for a few days, until they were called in again and Iron Man apologised. "I wasn't feeling like myself. I wouldn't kill you." He said. Nothing else. Just that, and it was enough to persuade Steve to move back in again.

Steve knew by now that his life was crazy, and Stark was weird. He brought it up with the others, who also lived in the Tower, but other than Bruce none of them had received any messages, and Bruce's were all about science.

That evening, he got another message from Stark. 'You can call me Tony, you know. I always think that when you say Stark you mean my father.'

*A*

It was about then that the messages increased in frequency. 'Ouch, have you seen any painkillers around? I can't find mine.' This worried Steve, it should have said on Stark's file that he took painkillers.

'They're Diamorphine. For chronic pain. I'm building up a resistance to it, though, and it's my last option.' Steve searched it. It was for people who were dying.

'Good, found them. I'm not dying, by the way. They're for the arc reactor.'

This was the end of the messages for the day, but there were more two days later. 'Hey, Steve. I'm lonely.' This didn't really surprise Steve. Tony didn't really talk to anyone outside of his CEO and his robots. But they didn't count, they weren't people. 'You shouldn't hide then, Tony.' Steve replied via JARVIS. 'Then you'd have people to talk to.' 'You don't understand. I didn't think you would.' Steve sighed. Trust Tony.


	2. Failed Persuasion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve tries to persuade Tony to be a little more social.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the problems the other day, I had mobile issues and so on so the originally a oneshot has changed into a multi-chap, which is easier to handle anyway now I've started school and my very important life-changing exams which I CAN'T FAIL. Just no.

'Tony, I really think you should get out and talk to people.' Steve messaged. 'How long has it been since you used your voice to talk to someone face to face other than your CEO?'

It took a long time for Tony to reply. 'A few years.'

'Tony, that's too long. What about your social skills?' Those social skills that he saw so clearly in every published interview. Those social skills on the videos on the internet when he gave speeches.

'Why do you think I stopped talking to people in the first place?'

'There's something you're really not telling me here.'

'I don't have to tell you. I could evict you if you keep pestering me.'

Steve shut up.

*A*

'Do you have any more persuasive things to say? I'm bored.' This message came at two o clock in the morning when Steve couldn't sleep.

'You could sleep.' Steve messaged back. 'Nothing wrong with sleeping.'

'Why are you awake, then?'

'I'm sleep-typing.'

'Hah. Funny.'

'Don't you want to actually talk to me?'

'No.'

Steve did actually feel a little upset at this. He'd thought that Tony liked him. 'Why?'

'Don't take offence. It's hard to talk to Pepper, and I've known her for so long.'

So Tony finds talking...difficult? That made no sense. 'Did you just reveal something key?'

'Yup.' Tony replied. 'But it's too cryptic for your little brain, I'm sure.'

Steve frowned. 'Are you insulting my intelligence?'

'Of course, sweetie. I'm superior in intelligence.'

'But you don't have enough intelligence to know that you should be out and around people.'

'Shut up.'

*A*

Tony didn't talk to him for a while, in fact, not until the next time they were called in, just over a week later. "Hey." He said quietly, faceplate down as always. "I appreciate that you talk to me."

"No problem." Steve said warmly.

They fought in the battle as usual, but Tony got even more beaten up than usual. There were holes on the left side of the faceplate. It revealed only blood, a few strands of bloodied hair and very pale skin. "Iron Man, are you okay?" He asked.

"Fine. Just fine." Tony said, his voice doubled, once through the voice processor and once through the holes in the plate. He sounded strained.

"Just take the helmet off and you can get medical attention." Steve said gently.

Tony flew off.


	3. Chapter 3

"JARVIS?" Steve asked. "Is Tony okay?"

It was immediately after he'd managed to get back from their latest fight, and Tony was injured and his helmet pierced in several places. It seemed like he had been badly injured, and Steve was worried.

"Sir is fine." JARVIS clarified. "He is sleeping off the painkillers I gave him. He shows no sign of future infection and has only mild concussion. The penetration of skin was only a single cut on his forehead, and though the suit may leave him with multiple bruises on his back and chest. There was no damage to the arc reactor or any of its workings and there was no internal bleeding or broken bones. Is this sufficient information?"

Steve smiled at the final comment, but he was still worried about Tony and all the injuries he was meant to be immune from because of the armour that protected him. "That's fine, thank you, JARVIS. Please let Tony know that I've checked up on him and I want his own confirmation that he is okay. When he wakes up."

"Yes, Captain Rogers." JARVIS said.

Of course, JARVIS had alarmed Steve when he first moved in. It was one of the oddest thing about the future, that there was a computer that controlled whole buildings, and had the ability, most likely, to practically take over the world. And according to Natasha, JARVIS had no protocol that prevented him from doing such a thing. But over time, Steve had just accepted JARVIS to be a part of the Tower. He trusted him, even, to take care of Tony. Because Tony didn't appear to be dead.

"JARVIS, you know a lot about Tony, right?" He asked, a slightly sly smile on his face. Maybe JARVIS could tell him what was wrong with Tony.

"Yes, I know more about sir than any other living person. I am always with him." If it was at all possible for JARVIS to have emotions, Steve could have sworn there was a distinct pride in his tone.

"Can you tell me what's wrong with him, in the sense of speaking to people?"

"I am afraid that the answer is restricted information, Captain Rogers." JARVIS said immediately.

Steve sighed. "Okay. Thanks, JARVIS. Is there anything on the topic that you can tell me?"

JARVIS waited several seconds before replying. "Sir very much enjoys speaking to you."

Steve smiled, and didn't ask JARVIS any further questions.

*A*

'I'm fine, Steve.' Tony sent the message the next morning. 'Best sleep I've had in months, actually. My sleeping pills are obviously crap.'

Steve winced slightly at the swearing, which was something he had not expected so much of in the future. 'You have sleeping pills?'

'Yeah. I don't take them much. They're only because I get nightmares. But the sleeping pills make me jittery and don't help me sleep at all.'

'I'm sorry to hear that. Though I'm sure you drink so much coffee that they don't make a difference.'

'Coffee is my life blood. My blood is probably 70% caffeine.'

'Wouldn't that kill you?'

'Probably wouldn't kill me. I'm pretty hard to kill.'

'I'm glad about that. How's your concussion?'

'I'm feeling dizzy. Not much else, really.'

'Good.'

'I have social anxiety. Among others.'


	4. Illness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony explains, Steve gets mad, Tony gets sick.

'What?'

'You heard me. I told you the truth. I have social anxiety.'

'I'm a man out of time, Tony.' Steve wrote, smiling slightly at the trust Tony had put in him. 'I have no idea what that means.'

'I find it difficult to speak to people. I fear being embarrassed in public. My mind naturally can't string the words together when I'm faced with another person. Though that isn't social anxiety, it's just a personal mind fuck up of mine.'

Steve sighed. More with the cursing. 'So that's why you refuse to face people.'

'Yeah. I'm just a coward.'

Steve didn't answer. He very honestly agreed with Tony that he was a coward. People who can't do what four year olds can do obviously have something wrong with them and should be working on it.

*A*

Tony didn't talk to Steve for several months. When he asked JARVIS where Tony was, JARVIS told him that the information was restricted.

"Is there anything you can tell me?"

"Sir is not at his best, but it is none of your concern, Captain Rogers." Was the only information JARVIS gave him.

*A*

The Avengers were called in, and JARVIS informed Steve that Tony was ill and was not allowed to fight according to one of the protocols JARVIS had inforced. Steve was angry but didn't force Tony to fight. He thought Tony was lying until JARVIS informed Steve the next day that Tony was running a very high fever and he could not care for him without a body, so he had given Steve permission to go to the penthouse to help Tony.

Steve wasted no time going up to the penthouse, feeling very guilty about his doubt that Tony was ill. "Where's Miss Potts?" He asked on the way up to the penthouse.

"Miss Potts is currently in Germany for business." JARVIS replied.

Steve nodded, stepping out of the elevator the moment the doors opened. He didn't like elevators at all.

The penthouse was much as Steve had expected it to be, a mess. It wasn't dirty, as such, but it was cluttered and looked a lot like a living space even though it was all flat reflective floors, walls and ceilings. It was lit with soft blue lights. There were wires scattered everywhere, half-dissected appliances that appeared to have been a microwave in a former life. It was as if Tony had picked something up and taken it apart as he walked, then put it down when he got bored.

Like a child with toys. Never playing where he should and with what he should, and then getting bored quickly.

Steve continued down the seemingly endless corridor, getting progressively more worried at the sign of no Tony. "JARVIS, where is Tony?"

"Sir is in the room at the end of the corridor, Captain Rogers." JARVIS replied. "He is, at present, barely conscious and is having a struggle breathing. I would recommend getting him a glass of water and pressing very lightly on his chest so the arc reactor casing shifts back to the normal position."

Steve nodded and continued down the corridor, which seemed to have a door at the end of it. He opened the door quietly as not to disturb Tony, but the second he entered the room he saw a figure sit sharply upwards. "Tony?" He asked softly, and all the figure did was shrink back against the couch he was sitting on, his mouth open, but not speaking.


	5. Despondent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve takes care of Tony for a short while (Only part one of the chapter).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm a bit ill, so this is short. But meh. Say if you like?

"Tony?" Tony didn't move. He just sat there, pressed up against the back of the couch. The couch was far from the door, and covered in ratty blankets. It looked to be the least expensive thing in the room, the room itself being a workshop of sorts, holograms floating above a few tables, some of which also having parts on them. One looked to be an Iron Man boot, and over a whole wall there were countless suits.

"Captain Rogers, may I suggest getting sir a glass of water from the sink to your left?" JARVIS chimed in.

At a loss of what to do, Steve did as the computer suggested and got Tony a glass of water. The man refused to take it when he was offered it, so Steve set it down lightly next to him. Tony snatched it up immediately and drank it all in one, hesitantly quirking his mouth at Steve when he had finished. He looked so confused, Steve mused. But he did have a fever. He would likely not remember it once it was over.

It was not a second later that Tony dropped the glass, his hands shaking. It didn't smash, thankfully, it was probably one of the glasses that were in the kitchen, ones that were hard to break. Steve picked it up and refilled it, setting it down next to Tony once more. Tony downed about half of it but then stopped setting it down and glaring at Steve. He still didn't say a word.

"Tony, are you going to say anything?"

Tony didn't respond, instead pulling a blanket closer towards him and pulling it over his arc reactor, shielding the light from view.


	6. More Illness

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve tends to Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Urgh, not long enough *sigh*.

After three hours of trying to help Tony, Steve realized that his problem was not the illness, but Tony's nightmares. The nightmares were waking Tony up and preventing him from getting the rest he needed to recover.

Tony did seem a little more coherent now, though he still hadn't adressed Steve at all, but Steve really didn't see that happening anytime soon anyway. Tony was now focusing on him and didn't drop almost everything that was put into his hands, as he had done earlier.

Nevertheless, Steve was very worried about Tony. Tony didn't seem like the kind of person who got sick often, in fact, as far as Steve knew, he never left his floor without the Iron Man suit, which had air filters. So something must have happened to cause Tony to get so ill so badly. Which was worrying.

*A*

For hours, Steve fretted over Tony, handing him water when he woke, trying to get him to eat something, which only succeeded in Tony having a tiny bit of soup and throwing up (into a dish held, again, by Steve), and watching helplessly as each time Tony fell asleep, he was woken by nightmares.

But, eventually, Tony's temperature came down to something more manageable for Tony by himself, and Steve could leave.

He now understood why Tony didn't go out in public. He was awkward even only in his actions, he clearly had shell-shock (which was called PTSD now, but the old name stuck for Steve), and he looked so unhealthy that Steve almost felt sick himself. But that, in Steve's opinion, still didn't excuse Tony from saying two fancy words and getting out of the world forever.

And with all this time waiting, and thinking, Steve finally knew what he was going to do to try and help Tony.


	7. Coaxing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Steve tries to get Tony to come down from the penthouse.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was started early because of a lovely comment I received that inspired me to continue.

"I want Stark to join us for games night." Steve said. He was met with silence. "He hasn't been well, he was running a fever and had anxiety problems, I think this could help him."

Natasha frowned. "Stark is never well in the sense that most people are, Steve. You know that. He's a recluse. The last time I saw him, it was long before Afghanistan, and he wasn't 'well' even then. Alcoholic, gambler, and he hardly slept. It isn't in his nature to get help, if it were he'd be locked up in a padded room."

Steve nodded. "But I honestly think we can help him, even if it's just a little. But he'd need to be here. Games night is the one night that no one misses, and it's a lot more laid back than a fight."

Clint snorted. "I don't really want Stark around. He isn't exactly pleasant company."

Steve saw the visible and audible signs of Natasha kicking Clint under the table, but he didn't comment. "I'll invite him. I'm not saying that he's going to accept, Clint, so don't worry. I'd like him to come, and if he does, it could help him."

*A*

'Tony, sorry to bother you, but do you want to come to the group games night?'

'No.' The response was instant. 'I'm not coming to anything. Still ill, anyway. Not that ill, but no. I don't want to come down. Don't want Barton to catch anything, like my social unpleasantness.'

Steve bit his lip. 'He doesn't mean that.'

'He does. Goodnight. Good morning. Whatever.'

Steve sighed. That was a no, then. He'd thought he was on to something good, something helpful, but Natasha was probably right. Tony didn't get help.

*A*

Steve tried many more times to coax Tony into the lower floors of the Tower. 'Tony, do you want to come and watch a movie with us?'

'Do you want Natasha to die next time we encounter fire? I'm working.'

*A*

'Bruce made some curry, do you want to come down to eat with us?'

'Nope, my stomach won't handle anything at the moment.'

*A*

'Thor brought some mead down from Asgard. Do you want to come and have a few drinks with us?'

'I quit.'

*A*

That was when Steve gave up. Nothing would get Tony down to their floors, nothing short of complete crisis.

He was surprised to find out that Tony had quit alcohol, though. That was one of the things that seemed to be a resounding opinion no matter who he asked; Tony was an alcoholic. So Tony wasn't a complete coward, not if he could quit.

There was always the chance that Tony was lying, but Steve thought that if Tony had quit drinking, then the situation wasn't as bad as it seemed.


	8. Exuberance

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony exhibits more odd behaviour.

Steve sighed at the scene in front of him. He just hoped that the reporters didn't get wind of it before it got sorted out.

Stark was laughing gleefully through the filters of the suit as the Hulk batted around in the air, trying to catch him. He was grinning too.

"Stark!" Steve called. "What the hell are you doing?"

Tony didn't turn to look at him, engrossed in his game with one of the most volatile and dangerous creatures on the planet.

Steve sighed again. This was getting to be too much. He wasn't getting used to this at all, despite it being a rather common occurrence now. Stark would be moody via all the messages he sent, and then, when he left the Tower, he would be overly happy and would get in the way for half of the battle. Steve had addressed him about it a couple of times but nothing changed.

Slowly, the Hulk began to shrink back to Bruce, and Stark descended to touch down on the ground. "Irresponsible, stupid, could have gotten myself killed, yes, I know. But what was I just doing? Having fun. It's a little rare for me now, Steve," he said sadly, and flew off, skipping post-mission debrief as usual.

*A*

Steve pondered Tony's words for a while. He knew, of course, logically, that there was no way that Stark had any fun often. The way he moped around, or seemed to (Steve was still yet to see the man after that one episode), it was clear that he didn't have much fun. But somehow, Steve had imagined Stark running along his lit corridors like a little child, maybe sliding down banisters or the equivalent that happened in Stark Tower.

He supposed that the image of a carefree child was intended. He knew that Stark did a lot of pretending and no one knew him that well anymore, and projecting an alternate image would be just a game to him.

Steve hoped that the game wouldn't go too far and someone would get hurt.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The reason this took so long is I'm very much a Doctor Who person now and this is incredibly difficult to write.


End file.
